AbsoluteOpinion

Fries With That?

Media Stuck
In a press conference about hurricane Rita and the current evacuation strategy Lt. General Russel Honore got a little upset. Reporters kept trying to compare the current strategy with what local authorities did do, or didn't do, or failed to do correctly during hurricane Katrina. After a few pestering questions General Honore replied with:

“You are stuck on stupid. I'm not going to answer that question. We are going to deal with Rita. ”

I think they've been that way for a while General.

The General did say said, “we can have a conversation on the side about the past, in a couple of months.” Now that ought'a be a good one.

In Charge?
Speaking of stuck on stupid – Mayor Ray Nagin is still demonstrating to all of America what a clear thinking decisive mayor really is. He decided to start bring people back into the city of New Orleans. Coast Guard Vice Admiral Thad Allen – oh yes, and President Bush – thought this was a bad idea right now. Not to be dissuaded Mayor Ray responded, showing true class and poise when he spoke about Thad Allen,

“Maybe since I’ve been away a day or two, maybe he’s the new crowned federal mayor of New Orleans.”

But then he changed his mind, turning away all the people who lined up to reenter the city. Yup, Mayor Ray is showing us what leadership truly is – in the same way John Kerry showed us what a winning presidential candidate is.

Weather The Storm
While the news has seemingly followed the weather channel lately – I'm guessing that the Roberts Confirmation hearings aren't getting the publicity they would under a normal circumstance.

So anyone really paying attention to the senators that have decided to tell us how they will vote before they vote? Didn't think so. Arlen Spector said he'd vote for Roberts, then turned from that camera to head down and to the left.

But here's what I'm sure everyone is concerned about – Jim Jeffords. Don't remember him? He's the former republican who decided to go independent right after he was elected. That's what lost the Republicans their Senate majority for a little while. Word is he's still undecided. No kidding.

Intelligent Lawsuit
It's the Scopes Trial – Part II. Sometimes remakes just don't cut it. Not sure how this one'll turn out. Eleven parents are suing the Dover school district because the distract plans on introducing – gasp – Intelligent Design into their public schools. Oh no! Tell students that Evolution isn't the only theory on beginnings! How could you?

In the past we've seen stickers explaining that Evolution is just a theory branded unconstitutional. Who knows how this'll turn out. I guess they're arguing that Intelligent Design favors religion – no kidding – so it violates the non-constitutional neoliberal idea of church and state separation.

Hey, if I were on the defense I'd open up with something like, “You got it, Intelligent Design takes faith, and it's inherently religious.” And so is Evolution. Neither of them are pure science, we need to treat them the same. Well, not really the same, only one of them makes sense. And in case you're wondering – it's the intelligent one.

Too bad they're just stuck on stupid.